Gossip is designed to elevate the self-esteem of the one whose tongue is wagging and more often than not, comes at the expense of the one being gossiped about.
Gossiping about another is a way of falsely esteeming the individual doing the gossiping and it involves putting down another who is not there to defend themselves against the claims being made against them.
Gossip makes the gossiper untrustworthy and it is cowardly at the least and socially damaging on an unimaginable scale at worst. If you have used the strategy of gossip before or you continue to use it now, stop it, it is a no win strategy.
Gossip is designed to undermine the one being gossiped about and can shape the opinions of many people against the one being gossiped about; it is cowardly.
Gossip is particularly offensive in intimate relationships as it brings on a death spiral if your partner finds out what you said about them behind their back.
If you need to gossip or complain about your partner to others, ask yourself why you are not speaking directly to your partner about your concerns.
A great self-test is to ask yourself if your partner was going to find out for sure what you said behind their back, would you still say it? There is a saying that it is easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. Maybe and maybe not. If your partner knew what you were about to say about them, would you reconsider, before spreading gossip about them?
We live in a time of incredible emotional immaturity, and for relationships to be amazing, we need to reflect on how we are being encouraged to treat each other and make adjustments accordingly.
If the people you were gossiping to, informed you they would tell the person you are gossiping about, would you reconsider whether you should spread the gossip in the first place, if it was going to backfire on you?
We are all responsible for what we do, think and say, and that should extend to the practice of gossip.
Break free from past patterns and set new standards for yourself with what lines you will or will not cross with your partner. To not gossip about your partner is a sign of respect and expect the same from them.
Relationships take commitment and a conscious effort to excel.
Often, I hear people say relationships are 50/50 and only put in half the work required, a failing strategy indeed. To thrive, partners need to be investing 100/100 for their relationship.
Take your relationship to a new level, use discernment and transform it to one of mutual respect and leave the gossip out of it.
Make 2023 the year to stand in your magnificence. Transform and evolve to become the best version of yourself. What are you waiting for?
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